When the trimester starts looming, paperwork overwhelms and the unpaid over time begins. It’s at moments like these that my thoughts turn to roads not taken. Although to be truthful, I had *no* idea these jobs even existed, much less how to apply for them. But someday…hey, a girl can dream, can’t she? Check out some of these super-cool careers out there for a lucky few:
San Francisco resident Reuben Reynoso jumps on mattresses for a living. Yes, you read that correctly. He works at a handmade mattress factory (meaning you and I can’t afford them) and his job is to jump on three mattresses a day in an effort to compress the cotton more evenly than a machine can. He claims it’s not as easy as it looks. I’m skeptical. I was the bed jumping champion by the time I was six. I’m betting I could do *six* mattresses a day, and do it in heels rocking to Bruno Mars. Plus it’d be a great thigh exercise.
Then there’s Ben Southall who beat out competitors for the plumb assignment of paradise island caretaker. This lucky guy gets paid $111,000 for a six month gig living rent free in a villa on Hamilton Island on the Great Barrier Reef. All he has to do for his paycheck is blog about his experiences snorkeling, gorging himself at barbecues and relaxing at a spa. I mean, helloooo??? I’m already blogging. May as well do it in a swim suit with a scantily clad Adonis tending my aching muscles. (This typing does cause my fingers to cramp up, after all.)
And now for a totally swoon-worthy job: luxury bed tester. *I can sooo do this!* A university student landed a job earning 1000 pounds a month to test Luxury Savoir beds for the Savoy Hotel and blogging about the experience. What does a college student know about needing a good night’s sleep? Has she gone through raising five kids, including a set of twins who didn’t sleep for the first eight years of their lives? I think not. I am a connoisseur of beds, in any case. Rox, Cindy and I once attended a conference held in a Wyndham Resort boasting Heavenly Beds. I don’t think I got out of bed all weekend. Getting paid to sleep? That is to me what getting a job testing video games is to a ten year old boy. (Or really, any male under 35.) And yes, those jobs exist, as well. But I won’t go into detail because guys don’t need to think wasting their lives on video games is going to lead to anything more than a permanent squint and carpal tunnel surgery.
But how’d you like to be a water slide tester for luxury resorts? I could do that. Especially if the job came with a fool proof way to arrive at the bottom with my swim suit still intact. There have been some…um…past wardrobe malfunctions that lead to that little caveat.
There’s really something for every talent: medical marijuana tester; candy taster; wine taster; even being a TV corpse. I have some former students who would excel The only skill needed is the ability to lie completely still, and for that they’d get free lunch and up to $200. Other than the pay, that’s basically how a few of them spent their days at school anyway.
But here is the ultimate, the most fabulous job in the world–how’d you like to be a slide operator for baby pandas? I know, right? Sign me up immediately. Watch this video of the trainer teaching panda cubs how to go down a slide. (Do not question why they need to know this. It’s about quality of life, ok?) I dare you to watch this without laughing out loud. It cracks me up every time:
Although some would claim that being a writer=hanging out in my chaise lounge all days in sweats or jammies and getting paid to make stuff up That’s pretty awesome, too. Awesome enough that I look forward to doing it full time sometime soon!
Do any of these jobs tempt you to change occupations? What’s your dream job?